10 Cocktails for the Game of Thrones


Published march 31,2013

Fire-breathing dragons, familial backstabbing, and plenty of expository sex. Game of Thrones returns to HBO on Sunday March 31st and season three of the epic fantasy show promises more blood, guts and sword-wielding glory as the seven noble families of Westeros each vie to be the rulers of all.

What makes this heady cocktail of drama so addictive? For one, there’s intrigue, adventure and magic! From incestuous power plays to dragon smuggling to the fate of one family in the hands of a bastard son, the show takes scandal to new snowy heights. For another, the intricately woven plot lines, the meticulous characterizations and the lavish production value are so well executed that all this far-fetched madness makes so much delicious sense.

So inspired by all the ruthless debauchery, we give you a four-part series of cocktails to enjoy ringside. We’ll start by honoring the most fun of the dysfunctional families, the Lannisters.


First up, inspired by our most unlikely diminutive hero Tyrion Lannister, played by the incomparable Peter Dinklage, is the Vodka Implet. It’s a play on the classic gimlet made with key limes, naturally. We also serve it in a double rocks glass. You know, cuz Tyrion has some pretty big rocks for a small guy.


The Vodka Implet

1 1/2 ounces vodka
1/2 ounce fresh key lime juice
1 teaspoon sugar

Place all ingredients in a cocktail shaker. Add ice and shake well. Strain into a chilled double rocks glass, garnish with a key-lime slice and enjoy.


Next, for the Queen bitch herself, Cersei Lannister, we have a concoction that captures her brazen spirit, her vindictive will and her dirty deeds. And we serve it a glass that will almost always make you lose your shit.


Blood Orange Martini

3 ounces gin
1 1/2 ounces fresh-squeezed blood-orange juice
1/2 ounce simple syrup

Place all ingredients in a cocktail shaker. Add ice and shake well. Strain into a chilled martini glass, garnish with a blood orange slice and enjoy.


Finally, for the the spawn of evil himself, Joffrey Baratheon, the young son of Queen Lannister, we created a dark, smokey cocktail spotted with bits of blackberry and it’s plenty bitter.


The Blackheart

1 ounce smokey scotch
1 ounce cognac
1 ounce campari
1 bar spoon blackberry jam
dash of Peychaud’s bitters
dash of Woodford Reserve spiced cherry bitters

Place all ingredients in a cocktail shaker. Add ice and shake well. Strain into a chilled rocks glass and enjoy.

The epic fantasy Game of Thrones returned to HBO last week and to commemorate the occasion we devised a four-part series of cocktail menus inspired by the show’s intrepid characters and puckish personalities. Last week, we divulged a drinks list inspired by the devilish Lannisters. This week, let’s catch up with those noble underdogs, the Starks.


The young and newly crowned king of Winterfell, Robb Stark is our first muse. Because he’s good-hearted and stout and in need of a boost of confidence (in the form of Absinthe), we think the English Blackthorne cocktail is the perfect fit. It’s a long-forgotten classic that’s due for its moment in the sun. Just like our dear Robb.


The Blackthorne
2 ounces Sloe gin
1 ounce sweet vermouth
3 dashes angostura bitters
A splash of absinthe

Place all ingredients in a cocktail shaker. Add ice and shake well. Strain into a chilled lowball glass and enjoy.

Next in line in age though not in rank is Jon Snow. He’s a member of the Stark family, yet he doesn’t share their name because he’s the illegitimate child of patriarch Eddard Stark and some floozy. Last season, Jon was busy fighting the creepy White Walkers in the snowy outer regions of Westros, earning himself a reputation as a badass that finally seemed to surpass his reputation as the most famous bastard in town. This season will he rise in the ranks of the Wildings that live beyond the wall? Or will he hop the wall back to Westros to fight alongside his king brother to restore the fallen reputation of his father? If there was ever an underdog in an underdog family it’s Jon and because we think he might just be the one to destined to claim the top spot in all the land, we’re bestowing upon his name the cocktail aptly called, The Magnificent Bastard.



The Magnificent Bastard
recipe by Bryan Swanson
2 ounces Bulleit Bourbon
1 ounce Berentzen Apfelkorn
Splash of Laphroaig 10-year scotch
2 dashes angostura bitters

Place all ingredients in a cocktail shaker. Add ice and stir vigorously for 20-30 seconds. Strain into a chilled glass and enjoy.


We love her sass, we love her spunk. The young Arya Stark may be the youngest daughter in the clan but make no mistake, she’s a tough cookie. Because she’s little and lethal we think this alcoholic adaptation of a Shirley Temple, fits the bill.


The Lady Arya
1 ½ ounces bourbon
1 ounce grenadine
1 ½ ounces lemon juice
lemon peel for garnish
Splash of San Pellegrino Limonata

Place the bourbon, grenadine and lemon juice in a cocktail shaker. Add ice and shake well. Strain into a chilled glass, add a splash of Limonata, garnish with a lemon peel and enjoy.


And for our last and certainly biggest menu item, we refer to Jeremiah Bonjean, who by day is a wedding photographer and Director of Social Media for Totally Rad! Inc. , and by night is a whiskey aficionado with a penchant for working his way through all the drinkable regions of scotch. This alone makes him apt for the job. But the fact that he’s one of the biggest Game of Thrones nerds we know (and we mean the original books, A Song of Ice and Fire by George R. R. Martin) makes him absolutely perfect for it. Take it away Jeremiah…

Hodor, Hodor, Hodor. He may be a minor character, but I love him. First, as a faithful servant to Bran, one of my favorite members of house Stark. Second, because he has yet to rape or murder anyone. And third because “Hodor” is just so fun to say. Try it. Go ahead. We’ll wait…

In honor of everyone’s favorite gentled giant I have a twist on an old southern recipe for “Apple Pie.” The batch makes more than enough to satisfy the thirstiest of giants, which means it’s perfect for a Game of Thrones viewing party. Be warned if you’re not over seven feet. It may be sweeter than the pies your grandma used to make, but the mash is 125 proof. If you drink too much of it you’ll be left with a one word vocabulary too.


Hodor’s Apple Pie

2 Cups Sugar
1 Cups Brown Sugar
1/2 Gallon Apple Juice
1/2 Gallon Apple Cider (I prefer unfiltered)
5 Cinnamon Sticks
750 ml Buffalo Trace White Dog Mash #1

(Traditional recipes call for Everclear or traditional ‘shine. However, I’m not insane so I always use White Dog Mash.)

Pour sugar, apple juice, and apple cider into a large pot. Bring to boil and then let simmer for 15 minutes. Stir occasionally.
Add Cinnamon sticks, and simmer for an additional 5 minutes. Let cool to room temperature, and add the White Dog Mash.

The “apple pie” mellows with age. If you can keep your hands off it for a couple weeks it just gets better and better.

To the delight of fans of epic fantasy fiction stories and grand blockbuster HBO productions (or people who’ve just grown to adore Peter Dinklage), Game of Thrones has returned to television for it’s third season. We’ve be chronicling the return with our special menu of cocktails inspired by iconic characters from the show, you can check out past posts here and here . For our third installment, we tackle the wily bunch beyond the walls of the Seven Kingdoms called the Wildings. More kindly known as the Free Folk, this band of outsiders have a heritage untied to any kings or queens. Some consider them savages or barbarians, we like to think of them as well-armed hippies.


Ygritte is our first muse. We first met this fiery redhead when she and her gang of Free People kidnapped John Snow. She’s feisty, cunning and tough so we’ve created a drink that’s as spunky and gingery as she is.


The Ygritte
1 1/2 ounces vodka
1/2 ounce cranberry juice
1/2 ounce fresh lemon juice
splash of ginger ale
2 large ripe strawberries

Muddle the strawberries in a cocktail shaker with a bit of ice. Add the cranberry juice, lemon juice and vodka and shake well. Pour into a rocks glass, add a splash of ginger ale, garnish with strawberries and enjoy.


Next up we’ve created a cocktail for the group of men called the Night’s Watch, a crew who guard the wall from beasts that reputedly lurk in the area and threaten the safety of those over the wall in Westros proper. Sure, these creatures haven’t reportedly attacked in a millenia (or have they?). And sure, this once-noble squadron seems to now be populated by a band of mistfits and half-witted criminals. All we know is that John Snow has joined their ranks and bringing some legitimate sword skills to their team. And what we for sure know is that a crew like that will need a drink with muscles to keep them alert and vigilant, that is, a drink with coffee. This has caffeine for punch, and Benedictine, an herbal liquor said to have been invented in a monastery in the 16th century to revive tired monks.


The Night’s Watch

3 oz. chilled coffee
1/4 oz. Bénédictine
1/4 oz. maraschino liqueur

Add all ingredients into a cocktail shaker. Add ice, shake and strain into a glass and enjoy.


Before we leave the outer lands we drink to the most mystical of mysteries beyond the wall, The White Walkers. This menacing race of villains has the reputation of killing everything it it’s path. They can even reanimate the dead and turn them into lethal zombies who kill at their bidding. So aptly so, this this drink is strong, biting and snowy white.


The White Walker
2 ounces dry gin
1 ounce Johnny Walker
1/2 ounce Cointreau
1/2 ounce lemon juice
1 egg white

Add all ingredients into a cocktail shaker. Add ice and shake well. Strain into a chilled glass and enjoy.






34 Ways to make the things you buy last longer…



Mix your nice hand soap with water and dispense from a foam handwash bottle.


When the eraser on your mechanical pencil gets down to an infinitesimal nub….


Make a bouquet of flowers last longer by adding a capful of vodka.

It’ll keep bacteria at bay. Add a pinch of sugar, too, for nourishment. If you don’t have vodka, a capful of bleach will also work.


Use an olive oil bottle for your dishwashing liquid.


Store your salsa and marinara sauce jars upside down in the fridge.


Placing a paper towel in with your salad lettuce will keep it fresh all week long.


Break your bananas apart.


Double your butter by whipping it with equal parts water.

Store it in an old margarine container. It makes an easy spread that’s half the calories. Just don’t use it for baking.


Store onions, garlic, and shallots in a paper bag punched with holes.


Keep your bread fresh with the celery trick.


Don’t touch your cheese when you are cutting it.


Add a dab of butter to the cut ends of cheese.


Buy organic milk.


Dab your skincare, don’t dollop it.


Add a couple drops of saline solution to your mascara when it starts to dry out.


Save a bottle of old, thickened nail polish with just a couple drops of nail polish thinner.


Swipe your nails with vinegar before applying nail polish — it’ll make your manicure last for 2+ weeks.


Store your foundation in the fridge.


To keep your hair color in longer, use an SPF.


Keep the colors in your clothes brighter by adding a pinch of salt to your laundry load.


Keep your pantyhose from running by placing your hosiery in the freezer for 24 hours


When washing your jeans, turn them inside out and marinate them in vinegar before washing.


In general, your laundry should be air dried when possible.


Only use a pea-sized amount of toothpaste every time you brush your teeth.


Sharpen your razor on a pair of jeans to make them last longer.

Run the razor (away from you), along the length of a pair of old jeans, about 10-20 times. Now turn the razor and push the razor toward you another 10-20 times.

Also, always remember to dry off your razor completely after using in the shower.


To keep your hair dryer from crapping out, suck the debris out of the back vents with your vacuum nozzle.


Alternate between two different pairs of shoes everyday.


Here’s how to keep your dry erase markers writing beautifully, longer:


Put your cereal in the freezer to keep them from going stale.


Keep the needles from falling off your Christmas tree by submerging the cut end in a pint of water with one capful of bleach.

However, DON’T do this if the roots are still on your tree. Or if you have pets who might end up drinking the water.


Make your printer ink last as long as possible.

Try using a font called “ecofont” that has tiny holes in it so you save on ink. Also, since black ink runs out faster than colored ink, print out your non-business-related matters on magenta or cyan ink.


Keep your laptop unplugged when not in use to ensure the battery lasts as long as possible.



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Harry Potter-themed cocktails

Harry Potter Grown-Up Style

Who said the Harry Potter craze was just for children? You may not want to dress up as your favorite Hogwarts character or eat a vomit flavored jelly bean, but you can still celebrate the literary masterpiece with these Harry Potter-inspired cocktails. Each one will have you spell bound and wishing for just one more book.

The goblet of fire

With this fiery beverage comes great responsibility. Only it will know if you are prepared for the ultimate battle of wizardry. This spicy cocktail isn’t for the faint of heart, only try it if you dare.

Serves 1


  • 1 ounce vodka
  • 7 ounces Bloody Mary mix
  • 1 tablespoon fresh squeezed lime juice
  • A teaspoon of hot pepper sauce
  • A sprinkle of black pepper
  • Lime
  • Asparagus spears
  • High proof alcohol like 151 or Everclear


  1. Fill a glass with ice and add the ingredients to the cup. Garnish with lime and an asparagus spear.
  2. Drizzle with a high proof alcohol and light on fire. Don’t attempt to drink your fiery drink until the flames have burnt out or you’ll be expelled from Hogwarts.


Moaning Myrtle

This ghostly cocktail may seem sweet at first sight, but don’t let it’s invisible exterior fool you. The fizzy flavor will sneak up on you when you least expect it. The good news is you don’t have to hang out in the ladies’ bathroom to find this martini and you won’t want to avoid it either.

Serves 1


  • 2 ounces Champagne
  • 1 ounce vodka
  • 2 ounces white grape juice
  • Purple sugar
  • Optional: Dry Ice


  1. Pour a small amount of grape juice onto a plate and a small amount of purple sugar on a different plate. Dip the rim of the glass in the juice and then in the sugar until the rim is coated.
  2. Add vodka, white grape juice, and ice to a martini shaker and shake until chilled. Pour into the martini glass and add the chilled champagne.
  3. For a ghostly effect add a small piece of dry ice.



Celebrate the Harry Potter way with this adult version of one of the Hogwarts clan’s favorite beverages. If this can quench the thirst of wizards, there is no doubt you’ll love it too.

Serves 1


  • 2 ounces vodka
  • 1 ounce butterscotch schnapps
  • 2 ounces cream soda
  • 1 ounce half and half
  • Butter
  • Sugar


  1. Melt a small piece of butter on a plate and pour some sugar on a separate plate. Dip the rim of your glass in the butter and then the sugar to coat the rim.
  2. Pour vodka, butterscotch schnapps, cream soda and half and half into a martini shaker filled with ice. Shake lightly until combined and chilled.
  3. Pour the mixture into the glass and serve.


Dementor’s Kiss

Have your wands ready and start practicing your patronus spell! This creamy delight is evilly delicious and it will steal your soul with just one sip.

Serves 1


  • 1-1/2 ounce crème de cocoa
  • 1 ounce vodka
  • 1 ounce coffee liqueur
  • 2 ounces of half and half
  • Cinnamon


  1. Pour a small amount of half and half onto a plate and some cinnamon on a different plate. Dip the rim of your glass in the half and half and then in the cinnamon.
  2. Mix the crème de cocoa, vodka, coffee liqueur, and half and half into a martini shaker filled with ice. Shake until it is combined and chilled.
  3. Pour into the cinnamon rimmed glass and serve.


The mojito that must not be named

Sip this if you dare but whatever you do, do not mention its name or you’ll bring evil upon us all. You should avoid this mojito if you have a lightning bolt-shaped scar on your forehead.

Serves 1


  • 2 ounces clear rum
  • 1 tablespoon lemon juice
  • 1 tablespoon honey
  • 2 tablespoons fresh chopped basil
  • 8 ounces club soda
  • Frozen raspberries


  1. Add rum, lemon juice, honey and fresh basil to a glass. Muddle the mixture with a pestle or spoon in order to crush the basil and blend the flavors together. Add ice, a small handful of frozen raspberries and fill the glass with soda water.
  2. Stir the mixture and serve.



Thanks for posting!

Kiss my Ingredients



5 or 6 oz. orange juice
2 oz. black vodka
Slice of orange for garnish


Place a few ice cubes into the serving glass of choice. Pour orange juice over the ice, then slowly top with black vodka.
Garnish with a black vodka stained orange slice to give the effect of rotting fruit.

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Yummmm I Love Fall!

Kiss my Ingredients



4 apples
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1 bottle vodka


Remove stems from apples.Clean apples well, pat dry and allow to completely dry. Quarter and seed apples; slice thinly, without peeling or coring.

In two 4-cup glass jars, mix apples with sugar; seal and let stand in cool, dark place for 3 days.

Add vodka, filling to top. Seal and let stand in cool, dark place from 3 weeks or for up to 2 months.

Strain through fine sieve, pressing apples to release liquid; discard solids. Strain again through coffee filter into decorative bottle; seal bottle. Stores for up to 6 months.

Serve cold in decorative glasses or shot glasses.

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